To be cool or to be useful: that is the question
fortunately I am both useful AND cool, which you will notice the moment you see my Birkenstock clogs
My mom and I are the only people in our family who like reality medical TV. And by reality medical TV I mean specifically the British show 24 Hours in A&E (first 8 seasons on Amazon Prime; all 15 seasons free on Tubi, whatever that is).
I am a sucker for British shows in a variety of genres. For one thing, my mother has a Belfast accent and so did I until I went to school in Los Angeles at age 5. There’s something extremely comforting about hearing English, Irish, Scottish, and Welsh voices. My mom and Nanny were often teased good-naturedly because of their overuse of the word “lovely,” and everything is lovely in A&E as well.
Ambulance Doctor: This is Erin, she’s 38 years old, went up a ladder and fell 72 feet onto concrete. Her head’s nearly off, all four limbs are broken, and her right hand caught fire when a lighted barbecue toppled on her during the fall. We had to revive her four times on the way here.
Resus Doctor: Lovely. Thank you!
The doctors and nurses are also frequently bringing patients cups of tea and sandwiches, I kid you not.
Since nobody in my household is willing to watch horrifically dislocated feet and shoulders and hips be relocated, or degloved appendages be inspected after motorbike accidents, etc., I have no choice but to put the show on when everyone else is away. For instance when I’m folding laundry.1
Yesterday I was watching an episode while my goddaughter napped and Harry was watching kids YouTube (whatever it takes to keep him quiet while the baby sleeps) and one of the young Scottish doctors said something revelatory. He described how great the team environment was at St. George’s Hospital, and explained that his role was not necessarily to tell people what to do, but to take responsibility for the choices made when dealing with a trauma victim. To take that responsibility, to make the call, in order to free everyone else to do what needed doing.
That’s a good leader.
Noah and I are re-watching Band of Brothers and listening to the anniversary podcast, and I’m reminded of how Dick Winters was that kind of leader. He didn’t expect the men to do something he was unwilling2 to do himself. No matter what you think about war in general,3 there’s an undeniable, profound nobility in the decision for a person to bear the weight of responsibility.
I also recently read a post by Michael DC Bowen about what he calls his “martial education.” Bowen is a self-described stoic, with an observably impressive intellect, and in his quest for moral coherence, he subjected himself to police, fire, and EMT training, among other things. Regardless of what you think of his conclusions, I deeply admire that he applied his intellect toward an embodied civic engagement.
He writes:
Law enforcement first requires a working understanding of the law, and also requires the kind of indifference to persons that is the cornerstone of liberty. Specifically all the implications of the 14th Amendment. When you actually see it in action, that kind of studied indifference can be offputting, especially considering all of the empathetic vibes that all of the cool kids are trying to demonstrate.
To state the obvious, if you are unclear about what the law is and how it applies in those common situations, like domestic violence, AND you are not willing to sacrifice scuffing your Reeboks to come between people throwing punches, you may very well be cool, but you’re also useless.
With that, I couldn’t agree more. One thing I’ve learned about myself in my 30s: I would rather feel useful than feel cool.
With all the reading I do, I’ve realized there’s no shortage of people willing to think (and pontificate on their Important Thoughts) but not to do. The common thread in these three examples is, I’ve just realized, the application of a thoughtful mind to physical reality in extremis. I value being thoughtful, but I want to also be capable.
Incidentally, all I have to do when I feel like watching the show is to bring out a basket of laundry. Everyone mysteriously disappears and I’m free to do as I please.
note there’s an important difference between “willing to” and “wanting to”
Though if you think BoB is glorifying war, you’re not paying close attention; the second episode alone includes the phrase “war is hell” and a soliloquy stating “The only hope you have is to accept the fact that you're already dead. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you'll be able to function as a soldier is supposed to function: without mercy, without compassion, without remorse. All war depends upon it."
Ah, the ol’ laundry trick.
That was lovely. Just a small typo: Welsh, not Welch. Now now — no sour grapes. I have a nexus with Cymru so I had to pipe up. 🏴
There that’s lovely I’ll go now shall I?