Quilting as a worldview
<p class="">I know this seems totally random, but sewing/quilting has helped me reshape my thought patterns in general. I’m happier and better off for it.</p>
The pandemic has allowed me plenty of time to dive into my nascent sewing/quilting hobby. I made a twin-sized quilt and a baby quilt for Ethan and Oliver years ago, then left the hobby for a good long while. (I did lead a learn-to-sew/quilt group making baby quilts for charity several years back, but that was about it.)
Since the pandemic, I’ve made five quilts, and I’m working on two more, with another in mind to start soon.
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I know this seems totally random, but sewing/quilting has helped me reshape my thought patterns in general.
Karen Brown, a quilter I follow on YouTube, frequently says, "quilters don't measure in micrometers.” I’ve also heard, "if you were after perfection, you wouldn't choose quilting."
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When I’m quilting, I'm creating a whole from parts that are malleable, variable, only controllable within certain bounds. Every fabric is different. Woven fabrics have two different directions they can be stretched; knits can often stretch four directions. Stretching (even from smoothing a cut piece, or swishing the iron back and forth) can warp the fabric. The sharpness of a blade determines how accurate a cut is, whether the fabric gets bent or squished before being cut. How you measure your seam allowance, thread tension, the type of thread, the speed of your sewing machine, whether you use feed dogs or walking feet, the thickness of batting between the quilt top and back, whether you sneeze in the middle of a seam, all of these things create variation. How focused or distracted I am will affect the outcome. I can either find beauty in the surprising end product or not.
Another sewist I like, who has disabilities, presented a helpful metric for the creative process: what is the ideal, the pretty good, and the good enough?
Applying this metric to every project builds in the acceptance that things will not always be ideal, but it's great to have an ideal in mind; “pretty good” is something to be proud of, and it's not a disappointment because you planned it as a possibility; and “good enough” still carries the sense of accomplishment. I find myself applying this metric to many aspects of life.
These sewing/quilting philosophies allow room for changes of plan. They allow me to change my standards as a situation develops. They help me prepare for both the best and the worst outcomes. They give me permission to adjust how I’m doing things or the speed I’m doing things based on what my health needs are.
Knowing that I might be in a life moment that means my house cleanliness will be “good enough” helps me let go of those moments of anxiety and irritation about the state of the floors or the laundry. (It doesn’t eliminate the anxiety and irritation; it helps me feel them then let them go shortly thereafter.)
Knowing that I have to keep my two eldest kids staying on task as much as I can with their online school helps me accept “pretty good” for my own schooling. (I was always a conscientious student; I still am, but my attention is constantly divided these days. I accept that I won’t have excess time to study, or excess brain space to stay supremely organized, that sometimes some things will slip through the cracks and my grades will be really good, not perfect.)
The ideal is always there to strive for, but the expectation I’ll reach it is always tempered. My thoughts are set up to find contentment and a sense of achievement at every level. I’m happy with that.